Exclusive Wet Nuns Interview

Wet Nuns

I had the pleasure of seeing Wet Nuns when they decided to come to my humble hometown of Bedford and what can I say?
Songs about girls, beer and the devil, a vocalist who sounds like he has swallowed a bag of razor blades and a very very loud set and to top it off deafness the following day!

Already tipped by NME as the band to watch in 2012, Matt Helders from Artic Monkeys seen wearing their T-shirt and remixing one of their songs, these are the guys to watch for 2012

Without further ado I present to you from the deep south (of Yorkshire)…. Wet Nuns!!
(Please do not mistake for ‘The’ Wet Nuns from Netherlands or there will be trouble!!)

Good afternoon to Wet Nuns on this glorious English day, hope all is well in the Wet Nuns camp?
It’s ok thanks.

Hope the tour is going well? What is the most memorable event of the tour so far?
The tour has been incredible. We never expected to get such a good reception in some of the places we played. There’s been some pretty crazy times too. One time, Alexis left the van key in the side door and didn’t realise until we stopped at the services! Mental. Another time, Rob sneezed all over the table in the back of the van! It was so funny we all fell straight to sleep.

I can’t help but notice you guys like Bombay Mix and now Double Decker sandwiches?!
Any more dishes from the Wet Nuns cook book we should know about?
We’re not interested in anything that isn’t Bombay Mix or Double Deckers. Bombay Mix is so incredibly versatile. And if you put four Double Deckers in a two-tiered sandwich, and eat it on a 2-level bus, you have a ‘double-decker double-decker double Double Decker sandwich.’ What’s not to like?

I had the good fortune to catch your tour de force of a live act at Bedford Esquires a few weeks back and I couldn’t quite put my finger on a category to pigeon hole you in, so I invented one… Death Blues!
If you had to categorise yourself and describe your sound to a deaf man what would you sign to him?
Come on man, we came up with the term ‘Death Blues’ three years ago. And someone else probably used it way before then. Stop trying to steal our thunder.
That Bedford gig was a good one! We enjoyed that, and Bedford was kind to us, and we got shitfaced.
We’re sure that your average deaf man wouldn’t give a toss what we sounded like. So we’d probably just shake his hand, but fart at the same time.
Great minds think alike?!

How did you 2 end up playing music together? What is the history of Wet Nuns?
We met when we both joined a power violence band. It was a great band but it didn’t last long. So we just carried on making music as a two-piece.

Which one of you fine chaps came up with the band name and is there an event that inspired it?
Rob had an idea for some lyrics which involved Wet Nuns… Then Alexis decided we should be a grindcore act that wore only wimples and leather thongs. That idea evolved into the act you know and love today.

What were the main factors and events that inspired you to pick up an instrument and influence your unique sounds?
Mainly being in a band. Rob’s been playing guitar since the womb. Alexis used to be a DJ but flogged his records and decks 4 years ago and took up drumming. We are influenced by a massive range of things. HP Lovecraft to Cormac McCarthy, Enya to Pig Destroyer, Last Of The Mohicans to Hot Tub Time Machine…

You produced a demo called ‘I painted Santa’s beard white with cum’, interesting title!
That demo was by another band, you bloody fool. “The” Wet Nuns are from Holland. Do we have Dutch accents? No. We have no “The” before our name either. Are you even interviewing the right band?!
N.B, my mistake, another 2 piece band described as the rougher bastard son of The White Strips and Black Keys, missed the ‘The’ at the start!
Are there plans for any release in the not so distant future? What are Wet Nuns plans for 2012?
Our main plans for 2012 are to play a shitload of gigs. Maybe like 100 gigs in one year. Easy. We’re releasing a limited 7 inch vinyl on Record Store Day, 21st April. It’s a double A-side with our tracks ‘Throttle’ and ‘Heavens Below’. We’ve got a couple more tracks in the bag for future releasing too….

Sawing meat, crocodiles, devils, chopping wood, stabbing pigs head, TVs thrown from windows and general dissection, just a few things you are likely to see in Wet Nuns videos.
What were the influences for these videos? Are you a fan of horror movies and if so any particular ones?
Yeah obviously we’re fans of horror films, and horror imagery in general. We don’t like listing films or bands as influences, because to list 4 of those would be to leave out 2508 other influences. It’s probably best to draw your own comparisons…

Might I also add the effects in the Throttle video are amazing, who came up with this concept and who was responsible for the awesome effects?
Alexis and the director, Darren J Topliss, came up with the idea in a busy trendy city centre bar. We needed something we could film quick and cheap. Alexis made all the blood, about 8 litres of it. Darren and his cronies helped spray the blood around, and Coco Bean did the makeup. And God made it snow. It was filmed in about 10 hours in the coldest warehouse this side of 1710. The only source of heat we had was a single tiny hairdryer, and obviously us and the babes were wearing very little most of the time. We were lucky not to actually die.

You are getting some great press at the moment, band to watch for 2012 in NME, in NME again the other week as the ‘Radar Stars’ and Matt Helders from Artic Monkeys sporting your T-shirt on The Jonathan Ross Show. How does this make you guys feel?
We seem to get little mentions in NME most weeks now, and Arctic Monkeys are really supporting us. It’s great obviously, we need some press. But it doesn’t make us feel any different. We’re still the same band, plodding along, struggling to pay bills and trying our best at this. Any help is welcome, and for it to come from such people is fantastic.

What are your thoughts on the likes of Matt Helders remixing your songs? Did you like the outcome?
Yeah, we love the fact that someone can turn our songs inside out, scrap most of it and make it into something totally different. Some bands seem to dislike that kind of remix, but to us, that’s what a remix is. Matt did a fantastic job. He’s a very talented bloke.

What is the greatest / most memorable Wet Nuns moment so far?
Probably the moment Alexis farted a Michael Jackson dance move.

What is your guys opinion on the current state of the British music industry and if you could say one thing to Simon Cowell what words of wisdom would you whisper / shout in his ear?
WHOA THERE. There is no-one in music wiser than Simon Cowell. Perhaps cunning is a better word… There’s definitely nothing either of us could teach him. The British music scene is appalling in the fact that Florence can be voted best Female in rock, and yet it’s brilliant in that we can see bands we really like, and sometimes even play with them. It’s fair to say that our favourite groups tend to go under the ‘popular’ radar anyway, and it’s probably best that way. No-one’s buying music much, but perhaps that will mean that bands will no longer get ripped off by big labels. Bands can release their own shit now, for whatever price they decide. Maybe that means bands have to work harder now, but that’s no bad thing!

A question I have to ask you otherwise my fellow What-Music.com colleague will not be happy…. Sheffield Wednesday or United or neither?!
Neither of us are originally from Sheffield, and nor are we interested in football. Sorry.

And finally if you were not in a band what do you think you would be doing right about now?
We’d probably have lots more money, but have shit jobs we hate. It seems to us that you sacrifice one for the other.

I would like to thank Wet Nuns very much for giving up their spare time to participate in this interview. Many thanks and I hope we will be hearing a lot more from you in 2012 and for years to come!

Cheers Jim!

Now you have got to know Wet Nuns and now realise they are quality lads, go check out their music, rush out to see them live and buy the double A side on Record Store Day. They will be big, you have been warned!

Matt Helders Heavens Below remix

You can keep up to date with Wet Nuns on the below:
http://wetnuns.com
https://www.facebook.com/wetnuns
https://twitter.com/WetNuns
http://wetnuns.tumblr.com/
http://soundcloud.com/wet-nuns

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